Saturday, January 15, 2005
i slpt at 6+am and i woke up at 10+am.
great.
now i just feel plain shitty.
doing this whole long survey shit din make things better.
i really nitto slp.
but i lay in bed and all i do is toss ard lyk salad.
sighs.
my indigestion is getting worst.
even yoghurt is making me bloated.
wtf.
think i'll go feast on my beehoon breakfast.
take some antacid and snooze.
fuck.
mutu went to juventus.
fuck fuck fuck.
looking forward to seeing my baby.
i just have a strong urge to hold him.
even though i barely left his arms.
alrites.
time to try get some slp.
At the Moment:
01. I see: my curtain flapping lyk crazy coz it's so super windy.
02. I need: to noe why i feel so bloated though i only had a cup of yoghurt.and some company in bed(i cant slp).
03. I find: my room in a state of disarray.as it has been for the past mth.i just dont have to motivation to clear up the mess.
04. I want: to slp lyk a baby.
05. I have: no money.but i'm dying to buy some shoes and lingerie.
06. I wish: for some valium to knock me out.i'm mudderfucking tired.
07. I love: my bear.and my baby boy.my girlies too.
08. I hate: people whose words are louder than action.followers.irritating consistent blabber with an annoying voice.
09. I miss: the good ol' days when the girls gather to bitch without interference.the dating days with my baby.
10. I fear: losing my people whom i put close to my heart.
11. I feel: extremely bloated and tired.a craving for a fag.slightly depressed.
12. I hear: the whirring of my fan and random clanks and banks from the saturday morning cleaning.
13. I smell: my berries basket yoghurt.
14. I crave: for some human warmth against my skin to lull me to slp.
15. I search: thru my pile of rubbish for the vcd i wanna watch to depress myself even further.
16. I wonder: if my baby is missin' me.and wat the hell is wrong with some people.or me.
17. I regret: nothing.i dun believe in it.
In the last 48 hours, Have You:
01. Cried: teared.
02. Bought something: yeah.food.
03. Gotten sick: nah.not even with a sickly boyfriend.
04. Sang: yeah.to some class95 ad.
05. Eaten: yes of coz.
06. Felt stupid: yeah.when no one believed my "nobody loves me everybody hates me" song.(tell them how it continues.)
07. Wanted to tell someone you loved them, but didn't: nah.i always tell my man i love him.
08. Met someone new: neh.i'm a social hermit.
09. Moved on: nope.
10. Talk to an ex: nope.
11. Missed an ex: nope.
12. Talked to someone you have a crush on: i dont have a crush.it'll be nice to have one.haha.
13. Had a serious talk: yes and no.i got my serious tots across in a not-so-serious manner.
14. Missed someone: of coz.i always do.even just sitting next to the person.:]
15. Hugged someone: -nods!-
16. Fought with your parents: nah.i dont think they care anymore.hahaha.
17. Dreamed about someone you can't be with: nope.
Social Life:
01. Boyfriend/Girlfriend: boy.
02. Hobbies: watching lame ass television (lyk meteor gardens for the THIRD time).playing mj (for the past 3 mths).reading.going to bookstores alone.sitting somewhere with a bitchy person and bitch abt everything and anyone who walks past.
03. Are you center of attention or the wallflower: wallflower.social hermit rem?
04. What type automobile do you drive: na.
05. What type automobile do you wish you drove: a mazda rx8.mazda 3.or a mercedes slk.
06. Would you rather be with friends or on a date: bad question.gonna skip this.
07. Where is the best hangout: for now it's dame's plc.
08. Do you have a job: yeah.fulltime girlfriend.parttime mummaidteachersocialescort.haha
09. Do you attend church: nah.i dont lyk to.
10. Do you like being around people: it really depends on the company and my fucked up mood.
Personal:
01. Who is your role model: i dont believe i have one.
02. What are your pet peeves: my irritating behaviour.
03. Have you ever been in love: i am.
04. Have you ever liked someone you had no chance with: liked?yes.
05. Have you ever cried over the opposite sex: yeah.
06. Do you have a "type" of person you always go after: nah.watever comes.comes.
07. Have you ever lied to your best friend(s): yeah.but i always tell them the truth after tt.the lie is to get outta the situation.
08. Ever wanted to get revenge on someone because they hurt you: yeah.i'm full of hate.
09. Ever been cheated on: yeah.
10. Ever said I love you to a significant other: everyday.
11. Rather be dumper or dumped: dumper.
12. Rather have a relationship or a "hookup": relationship.
13. Want someone you don't have right now: nah.totally satisfied with my catch.smiles.
14. Ever liked your best guy/girl friend: haha.no.
15. Do you want to get married: only if the wedding bands are frm tiff.heh.of coz i wanna.
16. Do you want kids: tt.i haven decided.
17. Do you believe in psychics: not till i meet one who can convince me.
18. Do you believe you know the person whom you will marry at this point in time: i dont.
19. What is your favorite part of your physical appearance: height.
20. What is your favorite part of your emotional being: i guess my emotional being is the worst of its kind.
21. Are you happy with you: not exactly.loads of room for improvement.
22. Are you happy with your life: depending on the aspect.
23. Are you depressed right now?: a lil.
24. If you could change something in your life right now, what would it be: state of my mind right now.
Thursday, January 13, 2005
i'm dying frm the anticipation of everything.
i'm waiting for a miraculous email frm u-noe-wat.(only worm and my baby noes)
dun worry.
if i get it i'll tell the rest of the world.
esp angel k?
coz i noe she'll be lyk "how come worm noe but i dunnoe.i'm a lousy fren"
no u're not a lousy fren.
it's just tt i haven spoken to u for so long.
and i'm waiting for a reply for my cleo subscription.
so whenever i can.
i'll be checking either my email or my mailbox.
and only now do i realize tt the postman only delivers at 3 or 4 in the afternoon.
since when man.
i always tot they were the early birdies.
had a crazy dinner with my boy mike and dame at chomps.
i haven been there for lyk 2385923234763357 years.
not as good as newton.
but alrite la.
this week's lyk a chillout week.
baby and i din do our proj today and we're not planning to tmr.
so it's gonna be hardcore next week.
thanx to the open hse.
we'll have more time for proj.
according to baby the guys got the tix to the match this sunday.
so yayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy.
it'll be my FIRST time watching a soccer match in person.
i'll wear red and scream myself hoarse.
wahaha.
i think i shld go drop dead in bed now.
mudderfucking tired.
no.
actually.
mudderfucking full and all i wanna do is slp.
-smiles-
i wish i cld be there stroking you to slp.
i wish i cld get u tissue when u wanna blow ur nose.
i wish i cld get water for u when u're thirsty.
i wish i cld give u a backrub when u're aching.
but baby.
since i cant be there.
pls pls pls take care of urself and get well.
i love u.
Wednesday, January 12, 2005
oh now.
i dun feel too good.
my throat is feelin' sand-paperish.
i just had kfc with my mum.
crap.
it's not good sticking my tongue down the throat of a sick boy.
now i'm feeling rather sickly myself.
yayyyyy.
i'm going running tmr.
after n years of abstinance.
i'm gonna dig out my pair of rotting adidas frm those wonderful crescent days.
and go round and round the track.
there's no point buying a pair of track shoes if i only wear them once in 2 years.
i might as well wear the old tattered and comfy ones.
now tt i'm gonna graduate and become a big girl.
i feel lyk inking my body.
and i nitto get formal-ish clothes.
and start acting old so tt i can get a decent job at least for a year or so.
ewwww.
my nails are wrecked.
they're not only stained by nicotine.
they're stained by a hundred different brands of nail polish.
yuck yuck yuckkkkkk.
mayb i shld stop painting them colourful for awhile.
i wanna go shopping for my heelies.
and i think it's time to get some new lingerie too.
-grinzzz-
i lURVE lingerie shopping.
-winks-
Tuesday, January 11, 2005
baby and i are extremely PISSED with ourselves.
coz we both overslpt and din watch the finale of happy fish.
fuck man.
but it's not tt bad when i have a friend who is a total tv slave.
so apparently everyone lives happily ever after and jiaqi doesnt die.
wells.
i'll be waiting for their vcd frm mediacorp man.
got really angry with tt boyfriend of mine.
at least we din scream at each other lyk we did before.
but my poor baby is sickly.
weak boy he is.
haha.
hope he gets well quick so tt i can be the lil jellyfish again.
school got me thinking.
we talked abt meritocracy today.
that's how singaporeans work these days.
by meritocracy.
so wat my teacher said.
meritocracy basically means that how far u go in life
depends on how hard u work (the merits).
since we were young kids
we were taught that if we din get a's for our exams
it's our fault.
if we dun get promoted or a pay rise
it's our fault coz we din work hard enuff.
why does no one question the society?
there are pple so rich in sg alone
that diamond parties are held at their homes.
where they host engage a diamond trader to her normally-humongous home
and invite loads of pple for hightea.
i mean honestly.
how many of us can lead a life lyk tt if we werent born into a mudderfucking rich family?
and how many of us can go to bmw
buy a 250k car and before leaving the shop
say "oh.you guys have those mini coopers as well right?throw in one for me too."
most of us will just be glad to even have our own car.
a nissan or a toyota.
well.
at least i'll be happy alr.
Sunday, January 09, 2005
yest was gooood.
had a fantastic dinner at nydc with my baby.
and met stupid alene tay there.
haha.
too bad we cldnt eat anymore and had to skip dessert.
caught the sea inside.
nice show.
meaningful one for a change.
it really tugs at ur heart.
heard a few pple crying.
so did i la as usual.
but i think baby got bored.
lyk how typical.
if it's not slapstick funny or blood and gore it's not his "thing".
wells.
i had a good time.
rouge-d after the show.
more lyk a chillout than a club.
drunk mudderfuckers all ard me.
paul puked his breakfast out.
gawain was lying beside his puke.
gabe had cup noodles and puked it alllll out.
wells.
for once i din black out at a club.
hehs.
